Let that title be a WARNING to you. If you have a weak stomach, don't read on.
I've been overwhelmed by slimy green goop, which has in the last 24 hours pretty much solidified to the consistency of double bass rosin. Okay, so you've never seen a tub of double bass rosin. It's so viscous that it appears solid, but if you tip the little canister it comes in, you'll discover that over a period of hours it responds to the forces of gravity and moves into a new shape. Last night I lay down on my left cheek and over the eight hours that I slept (remember Mother's Day. They let me sleep in.), the approximately one gallon of semi-solid mucus in my head shifted left, leaving me with a terrific headache and a lopsidedly swollen face. Ugh. This is just the second sinus infection of my life, but I'm starting to understand why people go to such weird extremes (snorting the contents of a neti pot, installing eucalyptus steam jets in the shower, submitting to that surgery where they chisel out your sinus cavities) to try to avoid sinus problems.
Anyway. Done moaning, but trust me, I needed to.
New topic. I loved Women's Conference! The conversation started at the Seattle Airport, wove in and out of the next two days of classes, and didn't truly stop until we were back at the Airport. It was hard to say goodbye. The classes were good--inspiring, motivating, full of insights--but the company was the best. Hurrah for eternal and amusing families! This time I felt that power of sisterhood and it was more than a cliche. How amazing to be there with thousands and thousands of women dedicated to service and righteousness. I've never been able to see that beyond the outward stuff that bugs me, but this time I really got it (as Kim can testify--I was moved to tears in the the crocheted mittens line).
I also thought (during Women's Conference) that I had made a marvelous new health breakthrough--sudafed plus as many ibuprofen as necessary (a cocktail recommended to me by Brett a long time ago) doesn't just make you feel better--it RESTORES YOU TO HEALTH!! You can ignore that pesky little cold that was keeping you down. Travel, stay up all night, eat mint brownies, be merry, for tomorrow there will still be sudafed and vitamin I! Ah, the body takes its ultimate revenge. My sudafed no longer comforts me, and my ibuprofen no longer makes me well. I have come to the valley of the shadow of secondary infection and I have learned my lesson. I know, Dad, I know. I was driving the combine with the air conditioning on and the stereo up full blast. I won't do it again anytime soon. I am forty and I know it.
3 comments:
Yay - I love low-brow blog topics! I also was glad to hear how much you loved women's conference - Marie had a great time, too, even though she was sick. One thing, though - I haven't seen any pictures. How do all us husbands know that you ladies didn't just blow off the afternoon session and head down to Chippendale's - Provo?
Shoot: the cocktail does't work after 40?? I use it all the time; checked with the state to see how much sudafed I can buy w/o appearing on their likely druggies list. Fed the mixture to Mike this morning after he stayed up all night reading. Really knocked him out: he's not as used to drugs as I am. Should have seen his half-opened eyes as he juggled Julia on the second row in Sacrament Meeting.
Women's Conference forever!! Can we go back next month?
You just need to do what everybody else does, which is escalate to the next thing in line. Sure you'll run out of track eventually, but think of all the fun you'll have. I still look longingly at those air-conditioned tractors, and I haven't been conscripted into farm work in 12 years.
Post a Comment