Play it, Mom

I bought a bottle of fish oil pills at Costco. My thinking: yes, they could be quackery, and they do make you burp fish, but what ACTUAL damage can they do, other than to the pocketbook? So I told Tim that some studies show that Omega-3 and Omega-6 make you smarter. He wanted to try this out. I gave him a pill to swallow. About five minutes later I looked over and he was still trying to swallow it. He would put it in his mouth, fill a glass full of water, get an incredibly determined look on his face, and then throw his head back, splashing water all over his shirt, his face, and the floor. He would look hopeful for a second or two, then spit the capsule out, fill the glass again, and start over. After about fifteen minutes of this, he jubilantly yelled, "I did it! I did it! I swallowed the capsule! I'm going to be smarter--if that's possible."

Church today was one of those humbling, exhausting experiences. I got up at 5 am to finish up Program Practice Prep. This involved lots of printing, collating, copying, and one large Eddie Spaghetti poster. At 8 am, I ran to my Ward Council meeting. Bishop: "Primary?" Me: "Nothing from us."

All heads swivel. Bishop: (incredulous) "Primary has nothing?"

I know, I know, me and my big mouth are the most popular members of Ward Council. I got home to find Mom and all boys in action, having made SIX pans of rice crispy treats. Thanks Mom. And we were even all in the car and off to church right on time. A beautiful, textbook morning. And then...

It started with the Organ. About half way through the prelude, a sizzling fried-wires sound was heard from the vicinity of the soffits and POOF! no more organ. Then, just as the sacrament was just coming to a close, into the reverent silence came a distinctive, loud, IRREVERENT, musically electronic sound from our bench. As the noise went on...and on...and on...and on... and nobody did anything about it, I began to realize that it was NOT one of the boys. The sound was way too pretty. It could only be one person on our bench.

Mom.

That's right. Let one unsearched person onto the bench, and that's what you get. I couldn't stop laughing (silently). Then it got worse. I had planned a complex schedule for Primary time and as a result I brought a whole bag full of watches to distribute to watchless teachers. I never thought about the possibility that some of them might be have alarms...that were switched on...and left at the default setting of...what ever time but 12 noon? So right about the time our very excellent WML speaker was approaching his conclusion (and I was once again sitting at the piano), all beeping broke loose from the Mumford vicinity.

We heard last night at (yet another) ward fireside that a Puritan woman and her employer's family were forced to leave their community because she smiled in church. My friends all tell me the best part of the Mumford reverence fiasco is watching me try to hold it together while playing the hymns.

Tonight at bedtime, Tim for some reason had his heart set on sleeping on the downstairs couch. He gave me every argument he could think of. Finally, I said, "Look, Tim. We sometimes DO allow kids to sleep on the couch, but NEVER on a school night." He demanded to see a copy of the family rules where that one was written down. "Tim," I said, "studies have shown that sleep deprivation actually reduces your academic performance." "Oh, don't worry Mom," he said. "We'll make up for that with the fish oil pills."

I have so much more to say, but I'm exhausted and I have to get up at 4:45 am to take Tom to the airport. We're so lucky to have Mom staying here this week--but LOOK! In spite of that, I still blogged. What commitment!